


You're Doing it Right

by HDO



Category: Hawaii Five-0 (2010)
Genre: Episode: s03e15 Coda, Friendship, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-18
Updated: 2013-02-18
Packaged: 2017-11-29 17:21:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,154
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/689517
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HDO/pseuds/HDO
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Steve is unsure. Danny reassures.</p>
<p>Coda to episode 3.15, <i>Hookman.</i></p>
            </blockquote>





	You're Doing it Right

**Author's Note:**

> I didn't think I'd ever want to write a coda fic, but after watching 3.15, this scene popped into my head. After Steve remarked that "time slips away," I remembered how earlier in the season Danny said that he was living on "borrowed time," and so I thought a fic in which Danny comforts Steve's angst about time seemed natural - they both know how precious it is, after all.
> 
> Also, while I love McDanno, I also really, really love Steve and Danny's canon friendship. I don't think we see enough tenderness between male friends in media, so I really appreciate seeing theirs.
> 
> And I really suck at titles.

Steve and Danny were seated in the old chairs along the McGarrett stretch of beach, somberly nursing beers and watching the sun go down.

Danny glanced at Steve, who had been too quiet. “What’s eating you, babe?”

Steve set his beer down carefully and looked back out at the ocean. “It’s just.” He stopped and sighed, frustrated. “I feel like I’m not doing it right.”

After several seconds of silence, Danny leaned in towards Steve, impatient. “Care to elaborate?” 

“Yeah,” Steve responded quickly. He took a deep breath and let it out. “Yeah. Like I said earlier today, I’m just thinking about how time just slips away. I told myself for years and years that it’s hard to keep in touch when you’re always on the move, but I’m starting to think that was just an excuse I was telling myself so that I didn’t feel so bad about it. Really, I didn’t take care of the people in my life because I liked what I was doing too much.”

Danny raised his eyebrows at Steve, surprised by his sudden loquaciousness. “I told you earlier, you were busy. Babe, for crying out loud, you were a Navy SEAL. I don’t think they give you much R&R if you’re one of those, correct? What were you to do?” he placated.

“Well, I could have tried harder. I could have done more,” Steve snapped bitterly, looking down at his hands. 

Danny started to see where this was heading. He cleared his throat and nodded slowly at Steve. “Okay.” 

“I didn’t even get any better at it once I came back here and had the luxury of time,” Steve continued. He shifted restlessly in his seat, agitated. “Today really drove that home today. I’ve been back for what, over two years now? And I still didn’t think to visit Keoki at any time. And now I’ve lost my chance to tell him how sorry I am about Chelsea.”

Danny put up a hand, cutting off Steve’s self-recrimination. “Hey there, big guy. Bring the self-flagellation down a notch, alright? Jesus, Steve, you’re _still_ busy. I know, because you drag me into it every damn day. And as for what kept you away all those years, it definitely wasn’t for _nothing._ You were protecting the free world and all that jazz.” 

“Sure. Sure, but,” Steve answered, still agitated. He paused and leaned forward, cupping his chin in his hands, tense. “I didn’t really view it that way for many years. For a long time I did it because it was just what I did.” He turned his head and gave Danny a somber look. “What if I had chosen something other than the Navy? I could have had all that time back.” Steve looked back out at the horizon, expression despondent. 

“As much as you make me nuts with all of your Rambo shenanigans, babe, I can’t really imagine a life where you had done something different. You may have self-imploded without a proper outlet for your craziness,” Danny quipped softly. He hated seeing that look on his partner’s face.

“I could have not joined the SEALs,” Steve persisted, sitting up abruptly. “I could have left the Navy and become a cop sooner. I could have made sacrifices. I mean, look at you.” Steve turned to look at Danny. “You moved across the world for Gracie, and then fought to keep her here. You really fought for her, made time and sacrifices for her. I can’t say the same, for anyone.” 

Danny reared his head back, eyebrows raised. “Now Steven, I’m going to stop you right there, because you’re getting morose, and dare I say, melodramatic,” he countered, pointing a finger at Steve. “And also, you’re _lying_ , because do you know how much you have done for the team, and for me? Need I remind you as to who was in court with me the other day, standing up for my noble character? Who was willing to be blown to bits by a _bomb_ for me?” Danny didn’t realize his voice was raised until he stopped.

Steve put a hand up for Danny to stop and then turned to face forward again, looking irritated. “Alright, alright. I get it.” 

“Good,” Danny answered curtly.

Steve rubbed his mouth. “The thing is, though, I’ve been there for some, but not for everyone. And I can’t fix that. I can’t get the time back that I could have had, with…Mare. And my dad,” he said wistfully. 

Danny ran a hand through his hair, deflated. He studied the setting sun on Steve’s face. Shadows settled into the lines etched in his face, highlighting his remorse.

“I think you didn’t make all these heroic sacrifices you’re fantasizing about for a reason, and that’s because you didn’t have the best relationships with them. And that’s okay, buddy, that’s just the way it was,” Danny answered quietly. 

“Yeah,” Steve said tiredly. 

Steve looked like he was resigned to more silence, but Danny wasn’t done. “Steve, do you know how much I’ve screwed up by not being there enough for those I love? Hey, look at me.” 

Steve turned his face to him, looking like a kicked dog. 

“Let me tell you: I have a brother who has fucked off to god knows where because he turned into a wanted criminal right under my nose, and an ex-wife who has spent a lot of her life hating my guts. I’m no angel, so don’t make me out to be. Even with Gracie, what I do isn’t some heroic thing. I do it because I need her, absolutely _need_ her, and will do anything to keep her in my life.”

Steve looked down, jaw tight. “Yeah. Okay.” 

Danny ducked his head towards Steve, never looking away from him face. “Babe, look at me again. I’m going to tell you something now, because, for one, it’s true, and also because I don’t think you hear it enough.” 

Steve turned his face to him again, still looking like a kicked dog. Danny tilted his chin down and gave Steve a chastising look. “I love you, and you’re doing it right. Okay? I mean it.”

Steve’s face slowly shifted into a lopsided smile, his eyes going soft. He let out a laugh and looked back out at the ocean again. “The feeling’s mutual, Danno.”

Danny’s laughter blurted out of him, a little harder than he meant to, but he didn’t really care. “Jesus, this is some Swayze from _Ghost_ stuff. I pour my heart out to you, and all I get is a ‘ditto.’ What a chump I am, seriously.”

Steve laughed with him, sounding looser than he had all day. He picked up his beer and tilted it towards Danny. “Thanks. I mean it.”

Danny clinked the neck of his beer bottle with Steve’s and leaned back in his chair, still chuckling. “Don’t mention it. Don’t mention it.”


End file.
